Don't look shocked, don't feign innocence; everyone comes here for different reasons, though they all want the same things - lust, money, power, and most of all: revenge. Don't be ashamed; your dirty little secret is safe with us. You can rest easy in your continued nine-to-five illusion, content and willing to tell yourself and your co-workers what a fine and decent person you are, that'd you'd never dream of entertaining such frivolous notions as trafficking with dark powers to bring your most hated rivals screaming to their knees in unimaginable agony. We know you'd never do such things, which is why you're here - to hire us to do them for you.

Delay your quest no further, weary petitioner; continue deeper into our profane labyrinth of cozy shadows and find that which you desperately seek.